I have been pursuing medical care at the maximum
rate the system allows - dead, dead slow.
Wheel of Diagnosis turn, turn, turn, tell which entry in the DSM III that we should learn.
I briefly decided trying to retire from politics/philosophy/current events.
This is due to having rampaging asshole attacks while discussing them
As I write this I just antagonized anti-war activist and heroine Cindy
Sheehan by having a poorly formatted opinion.
I was miserable and felt like I had just cut loose a huge part of me in order
to try and satisfy everyone.
So I decided to go ahead an have opinions and look at my favorite websites
and listen to my favorite podcasts, I just wouldn't discuss them with anyone.
I am working on that.
I hope that I can ... make some progress. I'll keep you updated.
What I am working on. This varies. The problem is this - Over the last 15 months
I have been wrestling with bad depression.
(As opposed to good depression?) I mean occasionally suicidal depression, and
often the really bleak stuff where life is a hopeless death march to oblivion.
One of the symptoms of a bout of depression is that whatever I am working on
at the time looks shallow, retarded and like a total waste of time. "There
is no way any one sane is interested in [Foo]."
When I recover from the episode (As much as I ever do these days), what
I was working on still retains that mental image of being retarded bullcrap.
The only way I know if a project is valid or is really retarded bullcrap is
when I get outside feed back.
So, if something I was doing worked for you, please let me know. It all looks
like brain damaged crap to me, right now. I could be wrong. Way wrong. But I'll
never know it by myself.
Please keep in touch and we'll see you next time.